i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
Randomize
