Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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