I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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