guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Randomize
