A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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