Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
