i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
The air taste purple.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
