One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
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