I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
