ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
