...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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