Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Randomize
