if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
