porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
