I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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