I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Randomize
