very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Terrible idea I love it
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Randomize