very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize