he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Randomize