loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Randomize
