im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
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