i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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