oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
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