Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
