You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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