somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Randomize
