She said her name was "party"
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Randomize
