I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
