We won't sleep together?
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
Randomize
