just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Randomize