Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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