he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Randomize
