he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
Randomize
