brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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