You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Randomize
