Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
Randomize
