I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
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