Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
he quoted the bible to break up with me
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
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