Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
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