whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
She swung at the pinata with crutches
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize