none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
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