Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
The struggles of a small town man whore
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
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