Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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