I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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