I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Randomize
