my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
Its about making memories worth repressing
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
Randomize
