But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Randomize
