i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Randomize