do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
You did what with his pubic hair?
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