He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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