he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Randomize
